It may be a cold winters day outside, but as I sit down to write this, the sun is streaming in through the windows, leaving a warm golden glow around me. My heart feels filled with light and love, so what better way to start writing about February’s inspirational theme: LOVE.
It may seem a little cliché with February already being the month dedicated to St Valentine, but please bear with me. I won’t be talking about the ‘love’ that fills the shops: the overly decorated and mushy cards, the plethora of red roses and the ‘lovey-dovey’ teddy bears. In the same breath, I’d like to point out that I am not a cynic and I think the 14th February can be a force for good, as it reminds many of us to say ‘I love you’ and to outwardly show how much we appreciate a partner. But why can’t we do this each and every day. We do not say ‘I love you’ nearly half as often as I think we should. And let’s not limit our love to romantic interests and other halves. I love my friends, I love my family and I love a lot of other things in my life. Whenever possible I try to sign off with a little ‘I love you’ whether that be by email or text or even on here – I always sign off with a heart full of love that you have spent your time with me. Even so, nothing beats a verbal declaration of love, so next time you see a friend or a family member, why not let them know just how much they mean to you.
Let’s talk about self-love. This affirmation came to me at a time when I really needed it the most. It was last year during a spiritual wellbeing event and I came home with a selenite crystal wrapped in a scroll of paper. On the piece of paper was the above affirmation and since then I have taken the words with me every day and tried to practise self-love daily. Self-love is highly linked to our feelings of self-worth. Do you think you are a worthy person? Are you worthy of your love, of another’s love, of another’s time? If we do not believe ourselves to be worthy enough, then why should, or would, anyone else. I am the first to admit I suffer with feelings of self-doubt, I am not very self-confident by nature but I am trying to carry a bit more faith in my abilities. I have always measured my worthiness against goals achieved, grades attained and similar measurable counters. But your worth is based on far more than your productivity. This is something I am getting to grips with each new day. It may not be the case that I have ticked off everything on my to-do list, but what I have done fills me with joy. Perhaps I’ve spent time with loved ones, or just generally chilled out and listened to my body when it needs to take it easy… I am learning to embrace this and not let it affect my feeling of worth. Every day is a worthy day. We may not ‘smash it’ everyday, but that does not mean it is any less worthy of our attention and declaration to enjoy life and to live life. It does not mean that we are not worthy of the light and the good that a relaxed day may bring. We are worthy of that good that comes into our life for I am a big believer in karma… what goes around comes around. Plant the seeds of good and the flowers will come to you in full bloom.
I want to share a quote from a true goddess and inspiration, Nicky Clinch. I have previously shared a blog post inspired by a podcast episode, which I titled Dancing with Balance. Her social media feed is a constant reminder to me to love myself and here’s just one example:
HONOUR & KNOW YOUR WORTH 🔥🦋🦄.Nicky Clinch
Every one of us is unique.
Individual & beautiful in our own right.
Each one of us inhabits qualities, flavours that ONLY WE contribute to this life & those around us.
This is what makes you YOU.
EVERYTHING in our life is a reflection of the worth we believe in ourselves on the inside 🌟.
Every relationship, job, lifestyle, money we make, the way we treat ourselves. EVERYTHING.
So the first part of stepping into our Warrior Woman is honouring & knowing our worth 🙌🏻
Every one of us is unique.
As a transformation mentor, I truly find her passion awe-inspiring and she is someone I look up to for advice and help. This worthiness she inspires us to appreciate will increase our feelings of self-love and encourage us to spend a little more time on some well-deserved TLC.
There is a lot floating around on social media if you follow the hashtag #selfcare or #selflove, but from experience they need to be taken with a pinch of salt. I follow some amazing accounts with inspiring messages and ways of practicing self-love every day. From a gentle yoga practice, to mindfully eating a piece of chocolate cake – to savour these precious moments with ourselves and allow the feelings of bliss and gratitude to flow over our beings. Another powerful lady is Jody Shield, who encourages us to:
Her social media accounts are filled with motivational quotes and affirmations that regularly shine the light for self-love. “love yourself, the rest will follow”. It’s all about accepting where we are today and forgiving ourselves for our past and allowing ourselves to move on to bigger and better things – things which will only come around if we love ourselves enough. Enough love to let go of commitments that weigh us down. Enough love to leap outside of our comfort zone. Enough love to break the ties of a toxic relationship. Enough love to lift us from the darkness of self-doubt and into the light of self-confidence. Enough love to allow the sense of pride, gratitude and happiness to fill our souls and our hearts.
There is not a one-size-fits-all solution to increasing your feelings of self-love but a few that I find helpful are the following:
1. Write down a list of things that you love doing, or you love yourself doing, and incorporate at least one of these things into your life every single day. It could be reading, running, cooking or martial arts. Whatever it is, do one of them today.
2. Keep a gratitude journal and jot down three things every day that you are grateful for. Then note down three things you are grateful for about yourself that day. Characteristics, attitudes, achievements, moods… write them down and re-read them.
3. Start a compliment diary. Every time someone gives you a compliment (it could be something as aesthetic as “I love your new skirt” or something a bit more spiritual like “your aura really lifts and inspires me”) write it down for future reference when you need a little ‘me-boost’.
4. Create a daily affirmation and repeat it, well, daily. Every morning and every evening, sit and say your affirmation out loud. The universe will listen and put your faith in the fact that is has your back.
5. Meditate – another cliché in the social media world but meditation or even quiet sitting really helps. Allow yourself a moment of calm, either using a guided meditation app or YouTube video or silently by yourself, and let the thoughts come and go. The sense of calm and stillness that follows is truly heart-warming.
There are so many more ways that you can increase your sense of self-worth and self-love but I think that’s enough from me for now. It’s time for you to start your journey.
With love and light x
p.s. Happy February
p.p.s. don’t forget to say I love you – to yourself and to your loved ones.